Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Uncyclopedia

Let it be known that I hate Wikipedia. It's populated by jumped-up trolls who care more about laws and format than truth and justice. Grrr. Said trolls jump out and say "boo" at Little Red Riding Hood as she skips harmlessly by, because skipping is not 'democratic'. But the trolls choose to let the evil clever Wolf slide on past, wearing Grandma's hoodie, because the Wolf has taken the trouble to disguise himself in the relevant protocol while he psychotically stalks his current victim.

It's apparently regarded by Wankerpedia as a no-no to be an actual expert on a subject. Soon I guess they'll have a text-in system, American Idol fashion, so the majority will rule on any particular factoid. If you would rather have Shakespeare born in Chicago than England, text 666 to 9454789...

That reminds me, I need to read The Cult of the Amateur.

So anyway, finding UNCYCLOPEDIA, a spoof site in the wiki style, has been a great pleasure.

Here is their entry on Murphy's Law Application for antigravitatory cats (the diagram above clearly explains the process.) The perpetual motion of the spinning cat is based on two laws - that toast will always fall on the buttered side; and that cats will always land on their feet.

There are several counter theories, mostly based on the impossibility of actually finding a cat that would let you strap a piece of buttered toast to its back. I particularly like the Second theory:

Cats are pandimensional, superintelligent creatures. So, when they think they are in danger, they start to
purr and travel to their original dimension. The reason why the cats stay in this dimension is because here they find enough food and people stupid enough to feed them.

1 comment:

Vanda Symon said...

Oohh, I love uncyclopedia - thanks for opening up that world!